Mom, You Got This

Being a mom of both young children (4 and infant) and older children (10 and 8), I feel like I have a foot in two different worlds of parenting.  And really, I am thankful for that perspective.  I know things now that I wouldn't have been able to articulate ten years ago.  But the funny thing about having kids so early is that now I find the rest of my friends catching up.  And I see my younger parenting self in the struggles and joys of my friends who are now finding their way as parents of tiny people.

Halloween 2008...they were two and four.  How did they get so big now?!

Don't misunderstand me...I do not think that I have this parenting thing in the bag.  I have no idea what it will be like to parent teenagers, or college students, or even my two tiny ones as they get older.  I really have no idea what it will be like to parent any one of my children even later today.  But I am able now to take the long view.  When the baby is up all night and the preschooler flies off the handle because his socks are bumpy or his water tastes funny, I can at least take some comfort in the fact that this, too, shall pass. 

The early years of motherhood are so intense.  I can't even find a word to describe it.  You have to be on all the time...there is virtually never a quiet moment to yourself.  They are in your bed when you sleep and when you wake up.  They are there when you pee.  They are sitting on your lap or on your hip while you eat your lunch.  And sometimes that marathon of mothering leaves you gasping for breath at the end of the day, wondering how you can even take another step.

But the good news is, it isn't all for naught!  Being a mom stretches us in ways we didn't know we needed to stretch.  No pain, no gain, right?  I think of it as building our parenting muscles.  The little annoyances, the struggle against our own selfishness or anger or worry, the sheer exhaustion...all of these help to rebuild, reshape, and strengthen us so that we can do the really big work that comes with raising kids.  Teaching them our values and our faith.  Teaching them to love other people and to serve the world around them.  Teaching them about sexuality and love and all of the other wonderful and complex things that kids and young adults need to know.  Guiding them through crisis and heartache and poor choices and wrong decisions.  The labor pains of mothering don't stop after birth! And the intensity of those first few years really do help to strengthen us in the ways that matter most for our children.  They help us bring to birth all of the things we want for our children as they grow and go out into the world. 

So, to all my friends who are wondering how they will even make it to the end of today: take heart!  You can do it!  And when you can't, God's grace will be there to pick you up, dust you off, and set you back on your feet for tomorrow.

Some unsolicited cuteness.