Since summer happened, I've been compiling a list of kids' activities that I secretly hate. Not so secret anymore, internet! Here they are in no particular order of loathing:
1. Paint
I always think this is a good idea. The artsy mom/teacher in me wants to like it and wants to expose my little Picassos to all manner of art ed. But it's basically a free-for-all around here. And the results are mostly questionable. Once this summer I thought it would be fun to roll out some butcher paper in the great outdoors and let them paint to their hearts' content. It could have been fun, I guess. But I put the paper on the sidewalk instead of the grass like a dummy. So not only were the children messy, but also the sidewalk. Eventually that tempera paint will fade away...probably faster than the memory. Also, when tiny people paint, they don't make anything. The goal is just to use as much expensive liquid as possible on the tiniest square inch of paper. Paint in the same spot until there is a hole in the paper--that's art, right?
I am vowing to leave all non-watercolor paint experiences to the experts at school.
2. Easy Bake Oven
For serious. I hate it. It is not easy, nor does it really "bake" properly. The only thing we have ever successfully made by following the instructions is a mini-sheet cake. Bought a box of Easy Bake Cake Pops? Sorry, kid...it'll have to be a plain ol' cake. Truffles? Sheet cake. Whoopie Pies? Sheet Cake. The last thing we made we actually had to cook in the real oven because it was so terrible in the Easy Bake. Maybe I'll sue for false advertising. They should just call it "Oven." Or "Buy This Terrible Toy and Your Parents Will Be Forced to Just Make You Cookies." I don't know. Maybe I have a future in product naming.
3. Dying Easter Eggs
I just dislike this holiday tradition. I can't really say why. I think it stems from trying to do it with tiny people who really have no business playing with eggs and/or dye. Now that some of the kids are bigger it's not so bad, but I still dread it every year. Last year I tried to be all Pinteresting and do the shaving cream egg dye. Basically you swirl food coloring in shaving cream then roll the egg around in it. Oh boy! Our hands were super dyed after this fun activity so I thought the eggs would look awesome. After letting the stuff sit on the eggs for at least 15 minutes (longer than the recommended amount, I might add) we washed it off to reveal...nothing. Basically a white egg that smelled like somebody's husband. So obviously that one's a keeper.
Onward and upward, my friends. Today I did an activity with 4 kids from ages 2-4 that I did not hate! And they liked it, too, so bonus! I just may start a series of posts with this theme of "Kids Activities That Aren't the Worst." It had just the perfect ratio of prep time (low) to keeping kids occupied and engaged time (decent) and was low on the mess-o-meter. Plus we can pretend they were learning something all the while.
Here we have the photo "tutorial"...
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| Write the kids' names REALLY BIG on some paper |
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| Cut some up some little squares of construction paper |
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| Let them glue them to the lines of their name |
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| End Tutorial. |
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| As you can see, it works for kids of all ages...might just look a little different! |
And here is my number one tip of all time:
When working with glue, use a tiny paintbrush. This is the best thing ever to avoid globs of glue everywhere. Plus it hones their fine motor skills like writing. The kids could paint the lines of the letters with glue just as if they were writing or tracing them. I just dumped some glue on a paper plate for each kiddo and let them go to town. You could also do this with Q-tips. (We actually sometimes use Q-tips to paint, so it just occurred to me that that is the only way I don't hate painting.) I suppose you could also use glue sticks, but whatev.
This project kept the
Tune in next time for more "Kids' Crap That Doesn't Suck." Now isn't that inspiring!
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